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I took this image in a forest setting with off camera flash. The cap was flung from the side and not in the frame to give the elusion of the girl running away although the forest but she was standing still.
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I like everything about your pose and composition and how the cloak is drawing the eye in. Unfortunately, the light is really harsh and background a bit too dark and competes against your subject. You don't say, which light-shaper you've used, but you really needed at least a medium size Octobox and then another light from the back (Cross Lighting Setup). At f/8, the background is also too sharp in focus, which leaves it competing against your subject. Next time, use as long a focal length you can get away, and shoot with a wide aperture.
I forgot to add my settings. Canon 600D F8 1/100 ISO 100 - Manual
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